small world...no joke

I was debating on writing a blog about this occurrence because I didn't want this blog thing to become a personal releasing space, but I can't resist.

I don't know how many people know or what, but I had a sister.  She passed away before I was born from a terminal case of cancer at the age of 12.  My mom was pregnant with me at the time.  I didn't know her, but I feel like I do from stories from my parents or pictures from her times.  When she was alive, my family lived here in charleston for some of the time in Goose Creek before moving overseas for my dad's job.  

Yesterday, I was getting into my car to head to leadership, and my neighbor, whom I have never really carried on a conversation with, asked if I was Carlynn.  I said yes kind of reluctantly because I wondered what bad thing I had done to the HOA in Oak Bluff now, that had all of the neighbors on the hunt for no other than me.  She told me her name and that I didn't know her but she knew my sister, very well.  Her daughter was best friends with my sister.  That is weird. I don't know if anyone really can understand how weird that is, but my next door neighbors knew my sister.  She would spend the night with them, always be at their house, and now here I am living DIRECTLY next door to them.  That is just plain weird.  But cool I guess.

I didn't really know what to say to her, I just kind of smiled a lot and said wow, that is really neat, and really weird.

The other plus too is that now I know that I have awesome neighbors.  Who will look out for my house, because I am really paranoid.  Don't ever try to sneak attack me, it won't end well for you.

But anyways, after all of these stories and hearing all about my awesome sister Laura, I really truly honestly have two things keeping me going towards the finish line, God and the hope and excitement of eventually meeting her.

gnight moon.

Mac-n-Cheese...and WHAT!?

I have a lot of free time now-a-days so I have no reason not to update this thing.  This semester has started out crazy but good.  My schedule is pretty stinky, but I have lots of free time in the afternoons to get things done and just be able to hang out with friends.  Even though I miss working all the time.  Maybe a part time job at apple?  Hm, something to consider...

Yesterday, I met Melissa and Eryc at our school cafeteria to eat food and watch the inauguration on one of the many tv's scattered around.  It was crowded.  I started eating what I picked out and Eryc asked me if I read the sign about the food being Obama's favorite dish?  Well come to find out, the theme was "The Obama Family's favorite foods".  I kind of wanted to puke in a strange way.  I mean I never got to experience Bush's favorite foods.  They could of had a Texas feast at some point ya know?  And then I watched as people wept and watched the new President take the stage and take his oath of office.  People were chanting his name, crying, and here I was, eating the man's favorite dishes.  I'm not trying to rag on the new President.  I like the man way more than I did at first.  I don't agree with some of his policies, but that is okay.  I think he has a great marriage, which it is good for people to have an example of that.  He will be a good leader, and at least people are finding hope.  Because America is in a bit of a slump.  But that is okay.  Obama may be our new President, but God is mine.  And God has every one of his people in the palm of his hand, watching over them.  And my trust is in Him. But I couldn't help but just get a little nauseated at the "worship" people seemed to be having for this man. 

Anyways, I'm going to tackle some of this spanish, hit up my 5:30 class, and peace out of here.  I have had a pretty productive day.  Class from 10-12, lunch, worked out, now about to grab some coffee.

Peace, love, and macaroni + msg (the Obama girls favorite!)

scatter brained

I wish I were sitting on the beach right now.  Hoodie on, barefeet halfway covered with sand, sitting close to the water hugging my knees.  It is so peaceful there.  And in times like these, that is what I need, peace.  I can forget the world for a few minutes when I am sitting there. Because all I can see for miles is ocean, and all I can hear is the waves, crashing on shore, then slowly fading back out, only to repeat the endless cycle.  I find God there.  Don't get me wrong, I find God everywhere, even in the busiest of places, but I really find God at the beach.  How can you deny a God who told the oceans where to stop so that a strip of sand could form.  And beyond the shore, crowded streets and crowded minds exist.  And those like me, forget to remember God in the midst of their busy world.  I need focus.  My focus is gone.  And I can't seem to find it.  The focus I really need is the kind that is on my creator.  Because when focused on Him, life begins to fall into place and meaningless begins to have meaning.  Those without purpose find purpose. The weak find strength.  The lonely find true love.

My mind is wrapped around life.  I am distracted by school, relationships and I'm just too busy all of the time trying to figure things out.  I just wish I could stop having to figure things out.  I wish everything I tried to accomplish wasn't so stressful.  I wish I were sitting on the beach with guitar in hand, pencil and paper, and a sunset.  Beautiful.

And maybe I will stop trying to figure things out by myself, because I am not created to serve a life devoted to my desires, but to my fathers desires, to fulfill my purpose that I have been called to fulfill for Him. 

goodnight moon.