driving blind

I don't recommend trying the title of my blog.  It is a bad idea.

I have been in a tornado of emotions these past few days and I haven't been myself.  I have been frustrating everyone around me, I am sorry.  I have been super stressed out lately with my lack of motivation with everything that was once very important to me.  It's like I hit a big speed bump and I can't quite get the back tires over the big yellow obnoxious line in the road.  School as been kicking me in the rear end.  My classes are hard.  And I feel like I can't keep up or understand fully what I am learning.  Like my computer programming class.  The concepts aren't hard at all, but actually applying the concepts STINKS!  I sit at home for hours staring at a screen throwing a bunch of nonsensical code into a box, hoping it produces something that is remotely close to what the assignment is asking for.  And it isn't like I can just get help from the book or something.  It just becomes impossible.  And I have to score a 70 on my assignment score in order to not have to retake the class.  Dear Lord please help me make it through this.  This class reminds me that I don't like programming.  I am intrigued with the hardware and problem solving of a computer.  Not developing long amounts of gibberish.  Then my calculus teacher is the smartest man in the world, but I have decided he is just too smart to teach.  I have no clue what the man is saying.  And math is something I enjoy and can usually figure out pretty easily. 

Then, all of this stress crosses over into my spiritual life and my relational life.  I start becoming slack on the one thing that matters to me the most, my relationship with God.  I start making excuses for quiet time.  And I start replacing school work with my time set aside for God and worship.  And when you do that, life just plain, excuse my french, sucks.  

So I am needless to say learning.  I am learning time management and how to better prioritize. I am learning that it is so much easier to involve God than to try to do things on my own.

On another note, I watched the debate tonight, and I am convinced on John McCain.  And yes, John McCain has a bracelet, BUT SO DOES OBAMA!  hahahaha. 

I am delirious, goodnight.